Why Success Feels Harder Than It Should

You don’t need more strategy. You need more self-trust.

I used to think success was all about having the perfect plan. If I could just find the right strategy, follow it to the letter, and avoid mistakes, everything would fall into place. So, I consumed every course, every book, every free download I could get my hands on. I convinced myself that the missing piece was out there—that someone else had the magic answer I hadn’t yet discovered.

But here’s the truth: I wasn’t stuck because I didn’t have the right strategy. I was stuck because I didn’t trust myself. And that lack of trust wasn’t something I created overnight. It was built over years of conditioning, borrowed beliefs, and internalized stories that told me I wasn’t enough.

The Root of Mistrust

My entire life, I carried a story: I’m dumb. I’m not smart enough. I’ll never figure it out. This belief wasn’t just something I came up with one day—it was reinforced over and over by people and circumstances around me.

In school, I struggled. When I didn’t understand something, instead of being encouraged to keep trying, I’d hear remarks like, "It’s okay, not everyone gets it," or "Maybe this just isn’t for you." Those comments felt like confirmation that I wasn’t capable. And the more I heard them, the more I believed them.

This belief shaped how I showed up in the world. It made me hesitant to speak up, afraid to share my ideas, and quick to dismiss my own potential. I sought validation from others because I didn’t believe I was worthy of success on my own. And the thing about stories like these? They don’t stay confined to one part of your life—they creep into everything, including your business.

Why Success Feels Hard

Success feels hard not because you lack the skills or drive, but because you’re carrying the weight of those stories. You’re trying to build something extraordinary while battling the invisible threads of doubt and fear that keep pulling you back.

When you don’t trust yourself, every decision feels heavy. You overanalyze. You hesitate. You wait for someone else to give you permission to move forward. And that energy—uncertain, hesitant, guarded—makes success feel like an uphill battle.

Here’s the truth: Trusting yourself isn’t just about waking up one day and deciding to be confident. It’s about doing the deeper work to understand where your mistrust came from in the first place.

• What beliefs about yourself were you taught to hold?
• Who or what taught you to doubt your own instincts?
• What stories have you internalized about your ability to succeed?

When you start to unpack these questions, you realize that the doubts aren’t yours. They were given to you by people who may have meant well but didn’t know better. By systems and structures that thrive on conformity. By past experiences that made you question your worth.

Reclaiming Your Power

Reclaiming my power wasn’t about proving anyone wrong. It wasn’t about achieving success to silence those old voices. It was about recognizing the story I’d been living in and deciding I didn’t have to believe it anymore.

I vividly remember one of the turning points in my journey. I was preparing to launch a new program, and that old narrative started playing in my head: Who do you think you are? What if it fails? I could feel myself shrinking, hesitating, holding back.

That night, I turned to my Trigger Response Method (TRM) to work through it. I started with the trigger: Why am I so afraid to put this out into the world? As I peeled back the layers, I realized it wasn’t about the program. It was about the fear of confirming the story I’d carried for so long—that I wasn’t good enough, smart enough, capable enough.

By working through TRM, I was able to separate the story from the facts. I wasn’t dumb. I wasn’t incapable. I was scared, yes, but that fear didn’t have to control me. I reminded myself that my worth wasn’t tied to the outcome of this launch or any other project. That shift changed everything.

The Deeper Work

Transformation doesn’t happen overnight. It’s not a quick fix or a one-time mindset shift. It’s about going deep and doing the work to heal the root causes of your doubts. Here’s what that looked like for me:

• Self-awareness: I started paying attention to the stories I told myself and where they came from. Journaling and self-reflection became tools to uncover the roots of my doubts.
• Compassion: I learned to give myself grace for the times I’d doubted or second-guessed. Instead of beating myself up, I started recognizing that those patterns were survival mechanisms—they weren’t my fault, but they were my responsibility to shift.
• Courage: I took action even when it felt terrifying. Trusting yourself doesn’t mean never feeling fear—it means moving forward despite it.

Using TRM, I began to:

1. Recognize my triggers: What situations or thoughts activated my self-doubt?
2. Observe my reactions: How did I respond when those triggers showed up? Did I freeze, overanalyze, or avoid?
3. Identify the payoff: What was the hidden benefit of holding onto these patterns? For me, it was about staying safe and avoiding failure.
4. Accept what is: I acknowledged the story without judgment and decided to release it.
5. Choose my response: I practiced stepping into the version of me who trusted herself, even when it felt uncomfortable.

Success Is an Inside Job

Success isn’t about doing more—more strategies, more effort, more hours. It’s about becoming more. More aligned. More intentional. More trusting of yourself.

When I started trusting myself, everything changed. I stopped wasting energy on overthinking and started channeling it into aligned action. I let go of the need for perfection and embraced progress instead. And most importantly, I started showing up as the version of me who believed I was already enough.

The hardest part of success isn’t the work itself; it’s believing you’re worthy of it. When you let go of the conditioning that told you to doubt yourself, success starts to feel lighter. It starts to feel possible. And it starts to feel like something you’re creating, not something you’re chasing.

What Would Change If You Trusted Yourself?

Imagine waking up every day with the belief that you’re capable of figuring it out. That even if things don’t go as planned, you’ll learn, adapt, and keep moving forward. Imagine the freedom of not needing anyone else’s approval to take the next step.

When you trust yourself, you stop looking for answers outside of you and start creating from a place of alignment. You take risks, you follow through, and you let your unique voice and vision shine. The right opportunities, clients, and connections are drawn to that kind of energy.

The question isn’t whether you’re capable—it’s whether you’re willing to trust that you are.

Your Next Step

If this resonates with you, it’s time to take the deeper journey. To uncover where your doubts come from, release the stories that no longer serve you, and step into your full power.

Join the waitlist for my new membership, where I’ll help you shift your energy, build unshakable self-trust, and show up as the version of you who knows they’re ready for the next level. Your success isn’t about doing more—it’s about becoming the person who knows it’s already theirs.